Contributed by Sammy Uyama
What does it take to bring your lovemaking to majestic heights? This is an important question to dive into. Our mission is to create radiant marriages because healthy families are the cornerstone of a healthy world and healthy marriages are the cornerstone of healthy families.
But besides that, who doesn’t want to be a majestic lover?
There are many parts to creating a strong marriage, but sex may be the most important barometer. When a couple’s love life is strong, they’re living in a place of trust, connection, and communication. In that place, they can weather just about any tribulation. However, no matter how good every other part of a couple’s life is, when there’s tension in the bedroom it sours everything else going on in their lives.
Having a majestic love life goes beyond the mechanics of intercourse. It’s helpful to know the logistics of good lovemaking (where to put what when), but you can know all the right moves, all the right techniques and still be missing the mark.
The first ingredient to majestic lovemaking is integrity. Integrity is the foundation for trust. When each side trusts in the integrity of the other then their relationship opens up to a new level of connection. Their promises have substance, as real as the ground they walk on. When integrity is missing, the relationship is built on sand.
There’s a concept that good sex is spontaneous sex. It happens on a whim, created from nothing but the raw passion of two individuals.
Oh contraire, my friend. That kind of sex is fun, but the really good stuff comes from anticipation. Starting from the morning or even days before, slowly building your way towards the big event.
Sending each other text messages saying, “I love you! Can’t wait til tonight ;)”
Going shopping together for special candles to light for the special occasion.
Talking about what you’d like to try out next time.
Don’t forget general romance. What’s that special way that your spouse feels loved? Help around the house. Give nice compliments. Write a sweet poem. Squeeze in a dozen or so non-sexual touches throughout the day.
Compare that to going about your day, business as usual, then minutes before falling asleep sliding over to your spouse’s side of the bed and say something like, “Hey baby, you thinking what I’m thinking?”
Sex is like a dance. Two people fumbling along until they familiarize themselves with each other as well as the dance moves.
Be intentional about improving your sexual connection.
Read books about good technique, about creating better communication.
Talk about how it went afterward. What each of you liked, what was so-so, what you’d like more of. Rate the encounter, 1-10. Make a game to improve your score as time goes on.
Track and analyze your performance. Professional dancers will record themselves and look at what needs improvement. (I’ll let you take that figuratively or not)
The last thing that will turn you into a majestic lover is bringing God into the picture. Recognizing that this incredible relationship you’re developing is exactly what God wants for your life, and seeing you and your spouse develop a healthy sexual relationship makes him really happy. That’s an awesome God.